Words Inside The Silence

“I lay next to her, knowing I should tell her what I needed to say, but choosing silence instead. I wanted to tell her I loved her. I wanted to hold her in my arms and make things right. Instead, I turned my back, feeling the void between us grow a little bit more.”

“I want to tell him how much I miss him. How much I need him to just hold me when he comes home, or to kiss me without it being about sex. I just don’t know how to talk to him anymore. I feel so alone and lost”

While it feels dramatic (hello, writers shall write!) it is a pretty accurate description of what happens to couples when they choose to ignore issues and try to “keep the peace” at any cost. 

Silence, my friends, can also shout. It is often the things we do not say that widens the gap between us till we may as well charge admission for the Canyon that has grown.

Love is not a passive word. It’s active. It means talking, acting, showing, every single day. It is a conscious effort to acknowledge the good and work through the bad. To say “I Love You” is to say, “I will listen as much as I speak. I will hold you when you cry, kiss you till you forget why you were mad. I will apologize when I’m wrong, and I will forgive you when you are too.”

Love is teamwork, compromise, a desire to learn from each other and grow. To love someone is the best kind of vulnerable. It is to give another person your heart, the “caution, handle with care sticker” clearly defined, knowing that they trust you as much as you trust them to hold it with the utmost of care.

We spend so much time trying not to cause “waves” that we don’t realize that beneath the surface, a whirlpool has begun. All the things we do not say, swirl and swirl around us, till one day we realize we are caught inside a current, hoping we don’t drown.  Perhaps it a toothpaste cap left off, or a sink full of dishes after a night out… All of the sudden you are arguing, fighting, yelling and screaming over everything and nothing all at once. 

You can fix this though. You can make sure it doesn’t get to that point. Have the tough conversations when they need to be had. Even if it’s not comfortable, even if, in the moment it hurts. Then come up with a plan to fix the specific issue at hand. Set a goal and work together as a team. Otherwise, let’s be honest, what’s the fucking point? If you push enough shit down the drain it will eventually back up. 

Do you want the key to fixing it? The secret that will make things right?….

Once you talk, once you come to a decision, and have listened as much as you’ve been heard….Kiss and make the fuck up! Don’t take away your affection, don’t take away your touch. It is by far the biggest mistake couples can make. If your partner says“I’m sorry”, and you say “I forgive” then do just that. You cannot say I accept your apology then leave your partner shivering in the cold.

Physical touch is a vital part of a relationship. It helps you reconnect with your partner by exchanging bonding hormones that help you to stay connected. Every time you withdraw your affection from your partner during times of anger or sadness, you are basically putting them out in the cold. Do it enough, and you’ll both end up with frost bite! 

You may fight, it happens to the best of us. It is what you do after though that counts. Kiss him; hold her; don’t let the other forget why you fell in love to begin with. Disagreements will happen. It’s human nature. If you can’t work through it though, then listen to your Auntie when she tells you that you are already halfway out that door. 

Inside the silence, you can hear a shout. It is the echo of all the things you need to say but leave for another day. A moment of discomfort that leads to growth and understanding or another night left mute, desperate to be heard. Insecurity, anger, resentment, fear, they all stem from a partner not feeling heard, not feeling respected, or seen. 

Who we fall in love with is sometimes not so black and white, it can sneak up on us in a moment without us realizing what has happened. Who we stay in love with, well, that is always our choice.

That Guy….Don’t Be Him…

“Come on baby. I know your head hurts but I’ll be quick. Just let me get in there and rub one-off. You know I can make you cum.”

“Would it kill you to dress up for me once in a while? Put on some lipstick and lingerie. I work hard all day, I don’t understand why you can’t make an effort for me.”

“Hey baby, I know we don’t know each other very well, but here is a pic of my dick…wanna come over and help me get rid of this hard-on?”

WHAT DO THESE 3 MEN HAVE IN COMMON? WELL FOR STARTERS NONE OF THEM ARE GETTING LAID LATER!

Oh boy….Really? I mean reeeeaaally?!

You all know these men, sadly, some of you may even be these men. They walk around a la Night at the Roxbury style, nodding their heads to the beat of their own music, completely clueless as to why they are not succeeding in their quest.

Soooooo, in order to assist the males out there in Cyberland, your Auntie is taking you to class. Get out your pencils boys. Your gonna want to take some notes.

THE LADY BONE’S CONNECTED TO HER MIND BONE…

So here is the deal. If you want her to respond, you need to turn her on. If we feel that you are looking for a cozy for your cock and not a night connecting with us you might find yourself left shaking in the cold. 

If you make her feel denigrated, used, or put on the spot, chances are she’s gonna dry up faster than the Sahara during a heatwave.

The woman who is made to feel desired wanted and sexy is a woman who is far more receptive to being physically connected with you.

Classic “That Guy” lines that did not go over as well as they thought:

• Oh yea. Take this big cock. You fucking, dirty bitch. Tell me who rocks your world. I’m gonna ruin you for other men. 
• Did you cum? Well….. did you? 
• Oh shit! Baby! That pussy is lined in gold. Damn this feels so good (as his head has been in my shoulder for the past 10 minutes and he’s forgotten there is a person attached to said…well you know…)
• I’m gonna cum in your mouth. Open wide….

SO……WHAT DO YOU THINK HAPPENED AFTER THESE LINES WHERE UTTERED IN THE HEAT OF THE MOMENT?

DID I?

A. Orgasm like a banshee and indeed was ruined for other men?
B. Realize that I have the best vagina in the world and have a plaque made in honor of it?
C. Fake my orgasm, silently giggle, and try my best not to roll my eyes during it all?

IF YOUR ANSWER WAS C THEN DING…DING…DING…YOU GET A GOLD STAR ALONG WITH YOUR COOKIES AND MILK! 

Cause here is the thing, only you are a porn star, or she is a porn star, and you are both filming a scene, you have to help a woman get into the “dirty zone”, even then, if your version of dirty is focused only on your experience and your appendage you are probably going to lose on this one.

If you want her freak flag to fly high and proud, give her a reason to unfurl the damn thing!

SAY IT WITH FEELING

So if you have been following along you will see that what you say is just as important as when you say it. Nothing gets a woman wetter faster than a man who makes her feel as sexy and confident as he believes she is. One easy way to set the tone for the evening’s fun is to get her going from the beginning of the day. A few key texts sent throughout the working hours can help go a long way towards helping her want to enjoy wicked games in the night.

Take a look at some things that you can send to your lady that help set the tone for the evening ahead. As always, modify them to your language style. I can promise you, if you are consistent with working on her heart and mind, barring any medical conditions that mess with her sex drive, these techniques do get results!

Things you can text or say on the phone to help set a very sexy tone:

1. Just thinking of you and looking forward to seeing you tonight.
2. I hope you’re having a wonderful day. Can’t wait to wrap my arms around you later.
3. Hey baby. Just wanted to tell you how lucky I am. You make me happy and I’m so very glad to have you in my life.
4. Do you have any idea how sexy you are?
5. Just sitting here at work and you popped into my mind. Wanted to tell you I was thinking of you and I can’t wait to see you tonight.
6. Hi honey. Get out that red dress and some heels. My mom is picking up the kids and I want to show you off tonight!
7. Tonight is you, me and your favorite bottle of wine. Can’t wait to spend time with you, no phones, just us.
8. I love you. You make me smile. Just wanted to you to know.

Did you by chance pick up on the theme of these texts? See the pattern that is beginning to flow? Not a single one of these has anything to do with sex! I know right? While dirty talking is fun and serves a purpose, the key to helping her get there is to first make her feel wanted and loved.

So often men go about this the wrong way. They do not understand that foreplay has nothing to do with your dick. It is about helping her feel your desire for her, helping her understand that you need her and want her. In doing this, you will be shocked at how receptive she is to want to express herself in so many other ways, most of which you will be the beneficiary for.

Now, fellas, I want you to take this advice to heart. So often I hear from men who say “She’s just not interested in sex”, “She is cold” “She doesn’t want me anymore”. Often it is not that her sex drive is gone, it’s that her head is so full of insecurity and worry that the signals are getting crossed! By helping her to understand that you value her, cherish her, and want her, you will go a long way towards helping her show you through physical expressions of love.

A SUMMARY FOR THE CLIFF NOTES GUYS

1. Engage her brain and her heart before you try to engage her thighs.
2. Know what kind of language she will respond too. Not all girls want Christian Grey (Well some of us do but not all…)
3. Let your actions speak as loudly as your words. If you’re love life is feeling as rusty as the Tin Man from Oz, the little things you do is the oil in the can.
4. Intimacy is not always about penetration. If you can make her orgasm without your penis, you are too quote J.J Walker “Dynomite”.
5. Last but not least, there are many ways to express yourself physically with a partner. If she is not in the mood to have sex, you can still have a very erotically charged, fun night. Creativity isn’t just for art class, fellas, get out them crayolas and draw outside those lines!

There are several more articles coming out on engaging with your woman and helping her feel as special as you believe she is so check back in soon. Make her believe she is worth it cause she is, and she will be much more receptive to showing you that you are too!

Such a “Dirty” Girl

Dirty talk is liberating, freeing experience but it can feel very strange and difficult to do. Before we even get into the nitty-gritty of this, make sure that you know this is something your partner would appreciate and get aroused by.

Not all men are into hearing their Sunday school teaching wife expound on the glorious feel of his cock while he’s in her ass, however, to be fair, a lot of them would!

Talking dirty is only effective if the recipient is into it. If not, you’ll end up feeling foolish and hurt and not as open to trying it again with the same partner or someone new.

Let start by looking at a scenario:

You’re in bed with your partner when suddenly the most graphic, explicit requests start flowing from their mouth.

“Come on baby suck my cock. That’s right you dirty little girl, take it all in” or how about the ever classic “Oh my God, that pussy feels so fucking good. Damn baby, just look at what I do to you, you’re soaked.”

At least once in our lifetimes we have run into “that guy” the one who is overly aggressive with his bed talk and it can be an instant turn off. After all, what do we say to that?

Can you imagine if we answered truthfully with the thoughts that run through our head when we are not prepared to respond:

“I do believe I was already sucking it but now that you’ve called me a dirty girl my enthusiasm has skyrocketed and I will double my efforts. Thank you so much!”

“Now that I’ve heard from your lips what I feel like on the inside I’ll never again be the same. I really feel like I owe you cookies or some flowers or something because you have moved me so much that well, like you said, I flooded at the thought. Thank you”

These are the “Eminem’s” of the bedroom. Free-flowing from the brain to lips at supersonic speed. Although let’s be honest, if it was Eminem in my bed, well he could tell your Auntie any darn thing he wants!

Intimacy Vs. Sex

We spent the night together, had sex throughout the evening. I enjoyed it but something was missing. It was like our bodies were connected but nothing else….

Have you ever had this experience with someone? Where you were involved in a very intimate act but somehow felt that there was a disconnect despite being naked in the same bed?

Well, gather round kiddos cause today we are talking about Intimacy and how you can build it with your partner, and hint…Penetration isn’t always the end goal!

So what is intimacy?

Isn’t having sex with someone the ultimate version of that?

Not necessarily. Intimacy is the connection you build with someone.

Where you feel safe, secure, and happy in each other’s presence. It is collected moments throughout your days together that leave you both feeling secure and happy, feeling at peace.

Intimacy equals vulnerability in the best kind of way.

It is looking your partner in the eyes and seeing love reflected inside. It is kisses shared when you first wake up, with sleep-covered eyes and morning breath, needing time in the silent moments to be together before life’s chaos barges in.

When you find this with someone you realize it’s the smallest things that get you the most: Holding hands as you fall asleep, or the freedom to be silly and goofy with each other without fear, without walls. Those small ones are kindling in the bonfire, helping to keep things burning outside of the bedroom so the one inside stays alight.

When you are physically together, intimacy is the stroke of a finger across the cheek, a kiss that speaks when words cannot.

Sex is a beautiful thing. It is two people connecting in a way that they do not with everyone else. Without intimacy though, it’s just fucking, and while that can be fun, it’s not what you always want.

If you are in a rut, feeling like your sex life is routine and part of every day, focus less on sex and more on connecting in meaningful ways. It is a ripple in the pond that impacts multiple facets of your life.

Before you can connect in the sheets, you need to connect your hearts. There is no greater gift you can give to another human being, than your complete attention, focus, and time.

Give it a shot. You won’t regret the end results!

Talk Dirty to Me

Sugar and Spice and everything nice, that’s what girls are made of……

You know that old rhyme, the one that reminds us as little girls to be sweet and be kind. To stay “good” no matter what. What happens though when you want to be more spice than sugar? More naughty than nice? 

Dirty talk is a liberating, freeing experience but it can feel very strange and difficult to do. Before we even get into the nitty-gritty of this, make sure that you know this is something your partner would appreciate and get aroused by.

Not all men are into hearing their Sunday school teaching wife expound on the glorious feel of his cock while he’s in her ass, however, to be fair, a lot of them would!
Talking dirty is only effective if the recipient is into it. If not, you’ll end up feeling foolish and hurt and not as open to trying it again with the same partner or someone new.

Let start by looking at a scenario:

You’re in bed with your partner when suddenly the most graphic, explicit requests start flowing from their mouth.

“Come on baby suck my cock. That’s right you dirty little girl, take it all in” or how about the ever classic “Oh my God, that pussy feels so fucking good. Damn baby, just look at what I do to you, you’re soaked.”

At least once in our lifetimes we have run into “that guy” the one who is overly aggressive with his bed talk and it can be an instant turn off. After all, what do we say to that?

Can you imagine if we answered truthfully with the thoughts that run through our head when we are not prepared to respond:

“I do believe I was already sucking it but now that you’ve called me a dirty girl my enthusiasm has skyrocketed and I will double my efforts. Thank you so much!”

“Now that I’ve heard from your lips what I feel like on the inside I’ll never again be the same. I really feel like I owe you cookies or some flowers or something because you have moved me so much that well, like you said, I flooded at the thought. Thank you”

These are the “Eminem’s” of the bedroom. Free-flowing from the brain to lips at supersonic speed. Although let’s be honest, if it was Eminem in my bed, well he could tell your Auntie any darn thing he wants!

Sat. Morning Coffee

Clarissa turns on her side, sliding her arm over the man sleeping peacefully by her side. Her leg curls over his hip as her arms enfold his chest. She listens to the steady beating of his heart as she gently circles her fingertips across neck.

He stirs, turning over to face her, his lips a magnet that pull her into him. Without conscious thought they move as one, his body covering hers as her legs wrap around his waist.

Her skin is slick with his sweat, her breath shallow and fast. Her body is the circuit, his the current and together a new Universe unfolds.

In the midst of her third orgasm of the morning, the bedroom opens and they turn their heads in sync. Her husband stands in the doorway, a towel snug around his hips, water droplets from the shower clinging to his muscular chest.

His eyes gleam as he takes in the site of her wrapped around another mans body, his cock raising the fabric it rests under. In two quick steps he is by her side, towel on the floor, his hands on her breasts.

She was overtaken by the moment, finding it hard to breathe as these two beautiful creatures claimed her body and senses. A moan escapes her lips as she is pulled to sitting then on her knees, forcing himself between her eager thighs.

Grabbing her hair he forces her head up, commands she open her mouth to receive her lovers gift.

She wonders momentarily if one can die from sheer pleasure, overcome with so many sensations that she feared she might. Over and over her senses were assaulted and her brain overwhelmed with chemicals that rewarded her from fingers to toes.

Her husband gave one final thrust and released himself inside her, his body removed, the ghost of his fingers in her flesh. He casually grabbed his towel from the floor, swinging it over his shoulder as she admired his retreating back.

She turned her attention back to her lover, a smile on her lips. Leaning in to kiss him she shuddered as goosebumps erupted onto her skin. They picked up where they had stopped, his cock and eager puppy ready to play once more.

As he entered her she dove into the whirlpool of desire created by his presence. Gave in to her need for him. She had not expected this primal reaction to him. The way she craved him, a junkie in need of a fix. Her body spoke to his in the place that words could not.

Her hazel eyes stared into his, the color of caramel and the summer sun. Her heart fluttered inside her chest as her nails branded his skin. Together they found their way to the cliff and leaped head first into orgasmic bliss. They lay there for a moment, bodies tangled like a ball of string.

“Coffees ready,” her husband said from the kitchen as the smell of bacon began to fill the air. They took their time in dressing, the pull of each other and the warmth of the bed, a seductive mistress hard too resist.

Making their way into the kitchen they gathered round the kitchen table, sharing a meal before they parted ways.

Clarissa smiled, sipping her coffee and looking at the two men in her life.

Two hands, one light, one dark, reached for hers, each completely different, both fitting like gloves.

She walked her lover to the door, savoring the taste of him on her lips. Her body beginning the process of missing him till they next met.

She closed the door behind her and walked back towards the kitchen, standing on tiptoe to kiss her husbands scruffy cheek.

Some people spend a lifetime to experience this once, lucky woman that she was, she had found it twice.

Let the Feasting Begin….

She rings the doorbell, her stomach in knots, a throbbing between her legs. He opens it and welcomes her in.

“Right on time” he says with a smile. “I was just getting things ready, dinner should be ready around six”.

She puts her coat down, follows him to the kitchen, he leans in for a kiss. What begins as something gentle turns rough and raw. She stands on her tiptoes, he cups her ass.

“Screw that” he growls, “I think I want something sweet”.

Without warning she is suspended in air, as her legs wrap around his waist, his hands find her hair. He pulls her head back and bites the hollow of her collar bone. She snakes her arms around his neck, holds on tight.

He walks with her wrapped around him through the living room and into the kitchen, lays her on the oak kitchen table pushing aside the wine glasses, and empty plates with the silver trim he set out hours before.

The wood is sleek and polished, cool beneath lust heated skin. Her eyes close and she focuses only on his touch, as the scent of want and need flows out of her pores.

He kisses her again, her toes curl in response. Her hips arch upward, an invitation spoken without a single word.

He pushes them down, “Not yet” he says. Then goes back to his work.

He unbuttons her jeans, slips them down her legs, takes in the garter and thigh highs hidden beneath.

His fingers trace slow, tortuous circles on her skin, sending off a litany of sparks. She tries to lay still as he commands, her hips have a mind of their own.

Grabbing her wrists into his hand, he pulls them above her head. Removing his tie he binds them together, “Stay still” he demands.

She counts to ten, takes a few deep breaths. Bites her bottom lip, and obeys his request.

His tongue replaces fingertips, he tastes her inch by inch. Methodical and deliberate, his hand covers her mouth, muffles her moans. “Shhhh” he says, “you’re going to scream for me, just not yet.”

She squirms beneath him, her panties now soaked. “Fuck dinner”, she thinks as his mouth nestles between thighs. Tonight she is the buffet and he can dine to his delight.

He rises, she tastes herself on his lips. He spreads her knees apart, slips his fingers inside inside, then has her lick them clean.

His cock is throbbing, straining against its denim cage. His jeans join hers in a heap on the floor.

She wants to scratch, to claw, have his DNA beneath her gelled fingertips. Bound, at his mercy, she revels in a bit of rebellion, wrapping her legs around his waist, pulling him in tight. She slides up and down the table as he claims her again and again. She has become a living, breathing toy and she loves every second of it.

When the orgasm hits it slams into her gut, his name escapes her lips. Her gift is words, he has rendered her mute. Her tongue has gone stupid so her body speaks instead.

He soon joins her, diving head first into her into a tsunami of need, releasing himself inside her, as his lips claim hers, and teeth bite into skin.

Lifting her off the table, he unbinds her wrists, kisses her slowly, and reluctantly lets her go. She stands on weak knees, collecting herself, slips her panties on. Her nipples are hard, her flesh a maze of goose pimples as she tries to catch her breath.

“So,” he asks, a mischievous gleam in his eyes, “Now that dessert is done, how about I make you dinner?”

“I’d like that” she replies, and pours herself a glass of wine, watches him head naked to the fridge.

As a smile forms on her kiss bruised lips. She never thought of herself as a dessert kind of girl, but there is a first for everything it seems.

She takes in the muscles on his back, the ass she could bounce a coin off of and she knows what she needs. Tonight she will become a glutton, binge on her desire and need.

He begins to cook their meal, and she waits as patiently as she can. A beast has woken inside of her and it demands to be fed. She will feed it as often as it wants, again and again and again…

Date Night Series V.1

The date night series has been designed to help give couples some fun and inspired ideas to do things together. Couples who “play together,” thrive together. Too often we focus on the excitement of the new and forget that the “old” can be exciting too. Check out the articles in this series for some fun ways you can reconnect and stay connected with your partner.

Let’s Have a Slumber Party

• Get in your coziest pajamas you own. Tonight, is all about going back to when you were young and carefree and did things like have sleep overs with friends!
• Set up the living room with a mattress and loads of pillows. Think, 4th grade Pillow Forts. Yea….you know what I’m sayin….
• Live dangerously and order pizza from your favorite greasy spoon. The kind that will give you indigestion later but will be worth it cause it tasted like childhood.
• If you really wanna go old school, grab a VCR player and cassette and go nuts! Otherwise choose a movie from you formative years that neither of you has seen in awhile and get into the spirit of this. Let your mind go back to when sleepovers with your best friend totally rocked. As an adult, who could be a more important friend than the one you share your life with?
• Throw the Jiffy Pop on the stove top and grab those paper plates and solo cups. Tonight, is not about will we or won’t we. It’s just a chance to connect, be silly and have some fun.
• If you want to end with a little naughty fun, spice things up with Truth or Dare!

The Scavenger Hunt

• Take 4 index cards and write out a clue on each one that will lead your partner to their destination, the location where you are waiting for the date!
• Start by placing the first card in the first place your partner checks when they arrive home. You want the element of surprise to be on your side with this.
• If you really want to go all out for this, you can put an outfit together for your partner and leave it laid out on the bed for them with the first clue attached. A text message beforehand asking them to check the room when they get home will get this going.
• The first clue should lead to the first destination. Get creative and use clues that only your partner would get (i.e. Next clue is where we had our first kiss) or you can just be direct (i.e. Down the street, turn left, then right….etc..)
• Try to limit it to no more than 3 or 4 stops before your partner finds you. Remember it’s about fun not stressing them out!

This date can be as elaborate or as simple as you like. To keep it with the under $20 theme, simply find a spot for a picnic ala Lady in the Tramp style, where you can bring spaghetti and eat outdoors with a checkered tablecloth by candlelight. End the evening with a recreation of the kiss and a photo so you can remember your night.

Dancing in the Dark

This is one for when the weather is a little warmer. Or if you really want to be adventurous, bundle up and snuggle under the blankets to keep toasty!

• Set up your backyard with tiki lights or just inexpensive tea lights.
• Make a playlist on your phone that has songs like you would have found at your senior prom. Some slow, some fast, all fun to reminisce on.
• Have your dinner outside and put away your phones.
• Stargaze together, turn it into a game. The person who names the most for instance gets to pass of dish duty after you are done.
• Once you are thoroughly relaxed and settled, pop on your music and just let go and have fun.
• Dance like you’re the only two people awake, and if the mood strikes, slow dance with each other, underneath those stars.

On the Road Again…

Who says you have to have a destination in mind for it to count as a date?

• Get in your car and grab your GPS. Give yourselves a certain amount of travel time.
• Once you reach the main highway in your town, set the timer on your phone for either 20,30 or 45 minutes.
• Flip a coin to see if you are going to go Left or Right to get started.
• Once that alarm goes off you have to pull into the closest town.

You can…

• Find a restaurant
• Find a coffee shop Find the local bar who has free music playing
• Find the town square and check out local art

The Writer

Trina couldn’t sleep. It happened like this sometimes. Insomnia reared it’s ugly head, a Medusa come to life.

He had gone to sleep hours ago, used to her nocturnal wandering throughout their cozy home.

“Perils of dating a writer”, she often joked and he would simply nod his head.

She wrote for a few hours, enjoying the silence of the house. Her characters slipping from brain to keyboard, freeing up space in her way too busy mind.

She sat in her living room, soft jazz on her radio, a glass of wine in hand, absently twisting the crystal stem as she thought how to resolve her latest chapter.

A few minutes passed, then a few more and she decided to call it a night. She loosened her hair from its customary bun, feeling the weight of auburn locks as the streamed from their captor to the small of her back.

He always loved when she wore her hair down but then again he was a guy! She chuckled at the thought of him with a head of hair like hers, he too would wear it up all the time.

On slippered feet she went to the kitchen poured a cold glass of water from the tap. Her dog followed by her side, accustomed to the strange hours her mother kept.

Slipping inside the sheets, she listened to his breathing, laying her hand on his muscular chest. A sensation of warmth spread from her fingers as she made contact with his skin.

She turned on her side, her old flannel shirt rising above her waist when she felt a strong pair of arms pull her close, holding her tight.

“Cheeky man”, she thought, “not so sound asleep as I thought”

She leaned into his embrace, her stomach flooding with butterflies as his lips found her neck.

She turned to face him, her hands caressing the rough stubble on his cheek. Even in the pitch black of a moonless night she knew every outline of his face.

His eyes, not quite green from the flecks of gold reminded her of foreign jewels that shimmered when he laughed.

His lips, the ones currently on her ear lobe had some strange magic to them, able to shoot electric sparks into her skin.

She felt his erection against her back and pressed herself closer, fighting the desire to purr like a cat.

His hands fumbled with her shirt as he lifted it off her head, his mouth found eager breasts.

Clothing was shed in rapid succession, his shirt, her panties, his sweats.

Soon nothing was between them, a thin sheet over their waists and her legs parted like a flower inviting him in.

Their hips moved in unison as he thrust himself inside her, their need grew into an avalanche.

Her first orgasm shook her to her core, she tried to catch her breath. She dug her nails into his back as she cried out his name, desperate for another release.

He joined her that time, spilling himself inside her, marking her body and skin.

He kissed her softly as the untangled their limbs. “I love you” he told her as they drifted into their dreams.

She felt her eyes begin to close, her stories for the moment content to sleep.

She turned into him and wrapped her leg around his waist, finally falling to sleep.

A new day would come before they knew, another chapter waiting for her to write. Of all the stories she could ever tell, though, it was what they shared, what he made her feel; that she wished to write the rest of her life.

Listen Up!

Do you like podcasts? If so you might enjoy my companion podcast found here!

https://anchor.fm/auntibsadvice

It’s real talk on issues that men and women face every day. Go ahead and give it a listen…you know you wanna 😉

You

You found me when I was lost. Your acted as my guide.
You held me when I fell, put me back on my feet.
You filled the cracks inside my soul with the superglue of your love.
You are my shelter in the storm, my rainbow when it leaves.
You make me smile till it hurts and hold me when I cry.
I had all these missing pieces, found that yours filled the space.
I was asleep until we met, today I am awake.
I never knew I needed you, until the day I did.
I never understood what love was until I let you in.
You took this broken wing of mine,
You gave me time to heal.
I never knew what love was.
Until I saw me, through you.

 

Cum to the Dom Side

I am by nature a submissive. I enjoy being given orders when it comes to sex. Tell me where you want me and how you want it and I am happy to oblige.

Knowing this, no one was more surprised than I was last night when my secret, hidden dominatrix, came roaring loudly to life.

Let me set the scene for you. My guy and I went to a local swingers club.

The theme was leather and lace. I wore a red and black lace corset, the kind that fits under your breasts, with a black lace push up bra. I had on black leather booty shorts and knee high leather boots.

I felt incredibly sexy. My hair was in a bun on the top of my head with two braids on the side. I had a black satin choker on my neck.

I wore a rather conservative black wool dress to the club since I wanted my outfit to be a surprise.

My guy, also had a surprise waiting. Under his form fitting top and jeans, he had a black leather wrap that resembled what Gladiator’s wore in the days of old.

I don’t know what it was, the outfits, the alcohol, the energy or all three but something inside me clicked. As the night wore on and people got more comfortable, I ended up shedding my dress. A few shots of fireball will make you over heat and lucky for me I had something very sexy on underneath.

I stripped down to my outfit and my guy to his, and we began to walk around. One of our friends had a dog collar on with a leash, I asked her if i could borrow it and the next thing I know, I am walking my “pet” through the club. He is a stunning specimen of a man and I was incredibly turned on by the reactions of the women around him. They wanted to touch him, kiss him, blow him and boy did they ever.

We met a very attractive, lovely woman, and things heated up quick.

She too had a collar and chain on and told me she would be happy to let me have another pet to play with. I got wet at the thought.

We went into a room where I ordered them to kiss. I wanted to watch him touching her and feeling her body.

The kissing turned to more and she eventually sat on his face where he went to town eating the offered buffet. I grabbed his cock and began to suck on it, feeling him grow hard and stiff inside my mouth. I wanted him to fuck her, wanted to watch her moan and wiggle underneath him.

He put the condom on then dove deep into her waiting pussy, pounding her hard and fast. I slapped his ass and grabbed his balls, running my nails down his back. To say I was turned on is an understatement. My guy is like a drug to me. Kissing him, touching him, it gives me goosebumps. To see another woman receiving the same pleasure was intense.

When they were finished, I leaned into both of them, kissing each on the mouth. Our new friend and I really got into the kissing and my hands caressed her breasts as I lay over my guys chest. People began to stream into the room and the moment was broken but damn what a moment it was!

Later in the evening, chain still in hand, I walked my “pet” into the main room where the women were all too happy to obey my order to worship his body. I kissed him while another woman sucked his cock, a third grabbing his balls and touching his chest.

It was a crazy night filled with many firsts, including my first oral sex session by another woman. I’ve never allowed a woman to “dine at the Y” and it was nice. Her lips where soft and her tongue was probing and wet.

All in all I had a fabulous time and am curious to explore this new, unseen side of me that I didn’t realize I had. I think in general I prefer submission but I have to admit, being in charge and giving the orders was really fucking hot.

The yin and the yang of my personality I guess. The duality of our nature and lives. We have the need to give and to take.

I am learning much about myself through my swinging experiences.

While I love to be told what to do, being the one to do the telling isn’t as bad as I thought. I could get used to explore this new side of me. Now go forth and be sexy….your mistress demands it….(;)

Samantha

Samantha was excited. She and her boyfriend were about to embark on something new. He was on his way to get her and she had to admit, the butterflies had already begun.

She wore her prettiest summer dress, a bright yellow, chiffon number with braided sleeves, her long red hair secured in a loose bun on the top of her head. Light pink gloss accentuated her lips and a touch of mascara made her green eyes pop. 

To complete her look she added a single flower in her hair, and a simple silver necklace the fell into her cleavage drawing the eye down to her perky and firm breasts encased in her favorite teal lacy bra.

He knocked on the door and when he walked in, as always her breath caught in her throat for a moment. He was tall, buff, and tan.

He had a chiseled jaw framed by a neatly trimmed goatee that still reflected the ginger red hair of his youth. His eyes, were what got her though, every single time. They were brown with flecks of gold and when he looked at her she ended up with shivers down her spine.

“Ready to go?” he asked. “As ready as I’ll ever be” she replied, a smile forming on her lips. He grabbed her hand and Sam had to steady herself by the door for a moment, the familiar jolt from his touch sending sparks into her feet.

They headed to his car, a black sporty thing, the top already down, waiting to hug the road and invite in the Springtime air. He opened the door for her and walked around to the driver’s side, fiddling with the dials before he landed on a station that played the music they both loved.

The night was bursting with promise of the adventure to come. Living so far from the city, the sky was filled with stars as far as their eyes could see, the moon full and bright, guiding them to the destination they sought.

“Are we really doing this?” she asked, “Are you sure were ready?” He slipped his hand in hers, his eyes leaving the road for a moment, to stare into hers. “Only if your sure, baby. This is for the both of us” he said.

Sam leaned back in her seat, allowing the breeze to kiss her face. She closed her eyes, taking in the moment, allowing her mind to drift into her veil of fantasies, preparing her for what lay ahead.

She had seen their pictures on the site and was attracted to them both. The husband was shorter than her Mark but built like him, fit and toned. The wife was much like her, petite and pixie cute. She had an air of innocence mixed with sexy woman that Sam found undeniably hot.

“Just dinner and drinks” she said to herself “Just dinner and drinks and no expectations, well see what the night brings as it happens” she thought.

They arrived at the restaurant and walked inside, the first to arrive they found a table in the corner in a discreet, less crowded spot. Sitting next to the window they would be able to see when they arrived.  “I feel like a teenager” she said. “I can’t believe I’m so nervous to meet them”.

“Me too” he replied. “I keep hoping they will like us and that our text conversations will translate into ‘real life’, let’s order a drink, they will be here soon”.

“Is that them? I think it might be…” she said. “Yep, there they are. Are you ready? Do you remember our signal if you want to leave?” he asked.

“Yes white wine for now and red wine if I’m feeling weird and want to back out”,she replied.

Just as she finished her sentence, the couple they were there to meet walked in. Their pictures did not disappoint. He was even more handsome in person and she was exotic. “Jasmine, Steven? Hi, it’s so nice to meet you both”

They talked over appetizers  and dinner then drinks. It turned out they all had a lot in common and as the night went on, Samantha felt herself relax. “I wonder what his lips will taste like” she thought, “I wonder what her breasts would feel like in my mouth…” As she sat there, politely discussing the minutia of life, Sam felt herself growing wet as she imagined what lay underneath their conservative and tasteful clothes.

“We were wondering,” Steven said, “We have a room up the road and if you would like to continue this evening somewhere a bit more comfortable we would like you to join us for a nightcap”

Without exchanging a word between them, Sam, knew immediately that the answer would be yes. They had been fantasizing, planning, talking, thinking of a night like this for months. She was ready and so was he. This couple felt right, it felt comfortable and good.

Mark answered for them as his hand grazed the back of Jasmine’s while Stevens fingers stroked the top of Sam’s thigh under the table “We would like that” he said, “why don’t we head out”.

They paid their checks and got into their cars, Sam and Mark following behind them to the hotel up the block. They walked hand in hand to room #226, the door closing behind them with an audible click.

“This is it” thought Sam, “It’s gonna happen, it’s real”….her brain suddenly shut off with the touch of Steven’s hand on her ass and Jasmine’s mouth on her lips….

 

 

 

Night Ride

The sky is pitch black, the sun has long set on the day. We hop onto the ATV’s, my arms wrapped around his waist tight.

Today was my first experience on one and it was both thrilling and terrifying all at once.

I feel so alive, almost electric, my smile hard to contain. We are with new friends who’ve invited us to join them on their camping excursion in their tiny slice of Paradise. This is our second outing of the day, having recharged from an afternoon exploring the woods and the river beds hidden deep inside.

We drive through an old junkyard, my eyes becoming saucers as I take in the sights. An old abandoned VW bus is illuminated by our headlights. My mind begins to race. Did it make it to Woodstock? Did hitchhikers, thumbs raised high, duffle bags slung over shoulders ride inside?

We pass a tiny camper, the kind built for two. I can imagine a newlywed couple spending the night in there, on their first jaunt out as man and wife. Did they make mad, passionate love inside the creaky bed, or light a campfire and gaze at the stars right outside their door?

We make our way to an area completely abandoned by others, a hidden spot that is only known to our friends. The hill to get down is utterly terrifying and my scream echoes into the night.

We land on soft, un-trodden sand and it takes a good 10 minutes for my heart to cease it’s race out of my chest.

Music flows from the portable speaker we’ve brought on our journey and we place a small lantern into the sand. It is the only light on this moonless night save for the twinkling of a million stars overhead.

He grabs my hand and leads my off the bike, takes me to an area a little away from our friends. He wraps his arms around me, warm, strong, muscular ones that make me feel safe and at peace. “I want to show you something” he whispers in my ear, as his lips graze the side of my neck. “Look out into the trees” he says.

I do and my breath catches in my throat, as I immediately feel a sense of wonder and awe. Thousands upon thousands of lightening bugs dot the trees. It is as if God has turned on the Christmas lights in June.

Goosebumps raise on my flesh and I wipe a tear from my eye. In that moment I am one with the Universe. Completely in tune to the magic that surrounds us but that we rarely ever have the chance to see.

I can only utter “amazing” as I try to process the brilliant show being played before my eyes. I turn to him and stand on my tip toes, he is so much taller than me. “I love you” I tell him, “Thank you for a perfect night”.

He kisses me softly then with abandon and electricity races down into my feet. The music on the radio has changed, it is something sensual and slow, and my body responds to it’s beat.

We make our way back to the ATV, our friends already sitting on theirs. 6 people, 3 couples, sharing a moment with one another in a singular space in time.

He straddles the machine and I climb on his lap, my kisses turning more urgent with every second that ticks by. I can feel him growing hard beneath me, his desire hard for him to contain.

He unbuckles his shorts and lowers them to his waist, I remove my white cotton panties, casting them into the sand. I straddle his lap, my eyes never leaving his as he enters me my teeth biting my bottom lip.

I glance out into the barely lit darkness and notice our friends have had a similar idea. One woman is bent over her bike, her ass in the air as he guy enters her from behind. The other is leaned back on the seat, her man exploring between her thighs as her legs curl around his head. My attention is drawn back to my own man whose lips are now biting softly on my neck.

He re-positions me over the top of the bike, taking me from behind. My dress still on but raised above my hips, the wind biting into my naked skin. I have to hold back the moan of pleasure that wants to escape my lips, knowing in this place we are in it will echo deep into the night.

I grab the handle bars with all my might, steadying myself as he thrusts deeper inside. I can feel my orgasm building and know it’s only a matter of time. My body shudders with release and I begin to relax, feeling his weight lean into me as we catch our breath and come back to a different state of mind. One of the couples has wandered further down the beach, the other couple is still on their ATV, the sound of their bodies meeting resonating in what I’ve come to think of a sacred space.

We remove the remainder of our clothing and walk naked hand in hand across the soft sand, letting it sink into our toes as our feet touch the cool water beneath. He wraps me in his arms once more and kisses my face and I tell him I love him with all that I am.

In all my life, in all the people I’ve met and the lovers I’ve chosen, he by far has been the best. Not because of the act of sex, but because of the time and memories he chooses to create. We walk back to our bikes and put our clothes back on. It’s almost 1 am and it’s time to head back for the night.

We’ve had several swinging experiences together but none quite like this. It is sensual, erotic, a throw back to the days of old when people experienced life together in a different way. As we ride back I wrap my arms around him tightly, my face pressed into his back, taking in the scent of his skin as the air whips my hair around my face.

I never knew a year ago I would find myself one night in the woods with 5 other people and would have one of the best one on one experiences of my life.

Life is a lot like that ATV ride into the woods in the dead of night. Unexpected treasures lay around every bend, we only have to be brave enough to take the path not taken and blaze the trail instead.

Write Your Own Rules…

Ask anyone who has been in the lifestyle for awhile and they will all be able to recount a time where they “went further than they wanted” in a situation.

Swinging, although a “group” dynamic, is a uniquely personalized experience. No one couple is going to seek the same as everyone else. Can you imagine how boring this would be if they did? What matters is not what others do but what you and your partner do.

Let’s face it, its hard enough to manage one relationship, add in a few more people, and well, if someone wants to make an app for that, I’d be happy to have a subscription, just saying.

If this is all brand, spanking new for ya, let your ol’ Auntie help you out with some of the lingo / guidelines that couples may use. In general, many couples stick to a handful of different areas of play/participation.

It’s like the clearance rack at your favorite department store, if you’re patient and look hard enough, you will eventually find a couple that fits!  

1. Same room play. For many couples this is a hard line rule. If you want to be in separate rooms without their partner they just won’t play
2. No Kissing. Some couples believe that the greatest intimacy comes not from the act of penetration but through kissing. It is something they reserve only for one another as a means of connection.
3. Group communication only. Some couples are not comfortable with their partners talking solo to a partner of the opposite sex. They will set up group texts or messages where everyone engages in conversation. Word of caution on this one. Is there a reason there is discomfort? Has trust been broken in the past? There is nothing more intimate than getting naked with a stranger and letting them bang you so not having a conversation solo beforehand could be a bit of a red flag!
4. Couples only. No Group Play. Some couples find the group dynamic overwhelming. Just imagine it, naked couples everywhere, bodies writhing in swings, on chairs, in showers and floors….ummmm where was I? Oh yea, some people don’t like it, it’s a personal choice!
5. Separate Rooms / Dates. For some couples, seeing their partner with another sexual partner is just not within their comfort zone. They go on individual dates with other couples, and in many cases, go back to share all the juicy details ala Gossip girl style while getting it on.
6. Unicorns or Bulls Only. A unicorn refers to a single female in the lifestyle, a bull is a single male. Totally honesty here, partners are not always a matching set! You can have great chemistry with one half of the couple while your partner is furiously texting the only way this will happen is if you are prepared to play Fluffer for the night. A single male or female can eliminate the pressure of not everyone being attracted and in turn keep you from getting a sore jaw!
7. Soft Swap Only. Soft swapping refers to the act of sexual play with partners outside of your relationship that does not involve penetration. Except with your own partner cause then its on like Donkey Kong.
8. Voyeurism / Exhibitionism Only. Last but not least their are couples who do not desire to play with others but prefer to either be seen or watch. Personally this is one of my favorite things in the lifestyle. Get me naked in front of a bonfire with a crowd and bring out the bongos and the daisy chain for my hair. I’m getting on with my hippie child witchie self and don’t care who might watch!

This is just a small sample of boundaries / limitations that couples may decide on to help them navigate through this journey. Nothing is “set in stone”. These are guidelines that can shift/change as many times as needed. 

The biggest “rule” in all of this, is talk, then talk, then talk some more! Before you swing, after you swing, you should be evaluating, and discussing what you feel and  giving voice to any concerns, needs or wants.

If you feel jealous or find that you or your partner are having trouble sticking to the boundaries you’ve set, STOP and TALK immediately. If you don’t, you are setting yourself up to fail.

 Set your boundaries, evaluate how they worked, chuck the ones that you don’t like out the window cause you can. This is about you and your partner. What feels good and feels right. If anyone tells you otherwise, send them to me and I’ll set them straight! Your Auntie has your back, ya’ll can worry about the front.

She/He Must Not Care

In the article “That Guy: Don’t Be Him”  we discussed how not understanding the language your partner is speaking can lead to frustration, anger, and resentment. This is a more in depth look at how “speaking at your partner” instead of with them, can lead to consequences you never want.

One of the biggest reasons that sex lives fail, that relationships get complicated and marriages eventually end, is that we forget how to listen, and how to be heard.

She says “I’m ok” when she’s not. She then analyzes and frets, not understanding how he can’t get what it is that she needs. Her anger builds a tiny bit more. 

He is desperate to connect with her, to express himself through physical touch. He leads with his penis instead of his heart and gets rejected once more. His wall of anger and resentment gets built a tiny bit more.

Green Eyed Monster

If anyone you have ever met someone who says they have not ever experience jealousy or insecurity,

A. Lying or

B. In Denial or

C. So new it hasn’t happened yet.

It happens to all of us and even to those in the most secure of relationships. Jealousy is a natural emotion. It’s human nature. It’s not that you won’t feel it, it’s how you deal with it that counts.

The absolute worst thing you can do when you feel that twinge of jealousy is to keep quiet about it. Your partner can’t fix what they don’t know is an issue. If you stay silent it will fester.

As you proceed in the lifestyle you will meet people from every walk of life. You will meet folks of every color, body type, educational level and socioeconomic level. With that being said you will run into people who bring out your own insecurities. Take a look at these examples and see which way you would respond.

Scenario 1

You and your partner meet a couple out for dinner. Your partner and the other spouse click right away, you and their spouse…mmmmm…not so much. You give it the old college try and decide to see where the evening ends. More and more clicking on their end, more and more silence on yours. Now at this point one of two things is going to happen:

A. You will tell your partner that you are not feeling a vibe with the other person and as much as you like they are having fun, you would prefer the evening ends play free.

B. You suck it up, take one for the team, watch your partner have fantastic sex while you are counting dust bunnies on the ceiling then find yourself really, really pissed off at your partner for not understanding what you truly wanted. 

Or how about this lovely gem:

Scenario 2:

You’re at a party when your partner meets a woman who makes you feel like the fat kid at dodge ball camp surrounded by the plastics in mean girls. Even though you are surrounded by others, who do they gravitate towards…….OF COURSE!

You are sure she is perfectly nice, you are sure you could maybe, perhaps, even be friends, yet something about her triggers your insecurities and they now have a megaphone screaming all sorts of horrid shit into your ear. 

Do You:

A. Acknowledge that you are insecure based on previous experiences and try to get to know her before deciding you hate her on site?

B. Tell your partner there is no way in hell, it ain’t happening, it’s time to jet yo, let’s go.

C. Do nothing at all, ignore what you are feeling then find yourself the following week, “dropping coffee on their lap, completely by accident when you see her name pop up on social media, thanking them for a great time?”

See here is the deal. If you stay silent, if you choose to ignore these feelings, they will come back and like a rabid dog, bite you square in the ass. You cannot put blinders on and either give your body away for your partner to have an experience, or deny you are feeling jealous, when you are.

The brains amygdala controls our fight or flight. It is also, what I like to call, our “Lizard Brain”, it is that caveman type of thought process that removes rational thought, replacing it with emotions that sometimes illogical and always difficult to sort.

Jealousy is not necessarily bad if it is something that you can be aware of, talk through, and process why you feel the way you do. Sometimes it is a minor thing, a readjustment in how your partner interacts with you and someone else. Sometimes it is far deeper, triggers from your past experiences that are haunting you in the daylight.

If you can never forget the following, you can get through it, and come out wiser and more confident on the other side:  Your partner chose you. Your partner is in love with you. The day to day intimacies of your lives are what make a life. Someone may have a better body, more money, a bigger cock or a more updated set of tits, in the end, it is who your partner chooses to wake up with and end their nights with that counts. 

Being vulnerable is one of the most intimate things we can do. Telling your partner you are not ok in the moment isn’t weakness, it’s strength. It opens the door for communication that while perhaps not the most comfortable can only help you grow as individuals and a couple.

It can be a powerful, motivating force for growing your relationship or one that can shred it to bits. It’s up to you to decide how you process this emotion and how you get through it as a team.

A WORD OF CAUTION.

If you find that jealousy and insecurity are regular parts of your relationship after lifestyle events, or with one on one couple dates, then you need to reevaluate.

It is natural to feel this from time to time. It is NOT natural to have it be an every day part of your lives. If every text, every date, every interaction with other swingers leaves you feeling more “tummy aching” than “wanna get it on” perhaps this is not the right choice for you as a couple.

NON-MONOGAMOUS PARTNERSHIPS HAVE A SIMPLE FORMULA:

YOU + YOUR PARTNER = 1st Priorities. 
ALL ELSE = Second through communication, boundaries, and rules you each respect and adhere too. 

If every day is a fight, if you used to speak with love but now only through anger, you need to STOP and reevaluate.

Swinging, polyamory, even fetish activities should enhance what you have, not take away from it.

You should feel charged in a good way, knowing that the person you shared your partner with had a small taste of what you receive every single day. Swinging isn’t about control, it is about release.

Sharing yourselves with others so that you reconnect with each other at the end of the day.

 

Pieces of Me

Sitting in my bed, snuggled beneath the comforter, I listen to the music that blares from the speaker on the stand.

The lyrics flow through me then in me, my eyes begin to close.

Your face so unfamiliar a short time ago, now etched into my brain. Eyes like blue crystals, a beach in paradise on a warm summers day. The dimple in your cheek, that shows when you laugh, rough stubble on your face. Lips like wine that invite me to drink them in and savor the taste.

I think of a few nights ago, driving back to your place. Your hand enclosing my own, no words needed just soaking in the sense of peace.

I looked out the window, towards a horizon colored in pinks, orange and blues. The angels took out their brushes it seemed, painting that phenomenal view.

I am struck by how right it feels, no longer strangers, we’ve become more. The simple act of cooking a meal, sitting at the table with only candle light.

The air is charged, what’s between us is tangible and strong. Trying so hard to focus, I could only think of you inside me, the magic of your cock.

Eating no longer an option, the plates are pushed carelessly aside. Your lips on mine turn me into jelly, I’m like a baby kitten, vulnerable and weak.

I cannot lie, I’ve become addicted and you’re lips are my drug and supplier, feeding this overwhelming need.

I loose my breath, clinging to you for oxygen. I have to take you in. Your fingers are like torches melting into my skin. I am seared and scarred in the best possible way, your imprint leaving marks beneath my flesh. The switch is flipped and I’m electrified, I scream, scratch and bite. The sensations are so intense they overwhelm me, pleasure merging into an ecstasy of pain.

You’ve unbound me from inhibition, I’m free floating in outer space.

Satiated for the moment we laid crumbled in a heap, our breathing syncs without thought. This is so natural it scares me. I’m afraid of getting hurt, too afraid to let go.

I didn’t look for you. Never crossed my mind. Yet here I am and here we are drifting into the unknown.

What a wonderful surprise to find someone you never knew you would need but can’t fathom now being without.

I sit, in my bedroom, beneath the sheets. Music flows into my ears and beneath my flesh.

I see your face as a smile finds mine and I cannot help but think. Each time I say goodbye, another piece of me is left. I count the days till I can see you knowing they have been well kept.

Pieces here and pieces there, it’s a difficult thing to do.

So hold me close inside your arms and dance with me so slow. Let me kiss your lips and collect them. I love you more than you’ll ever know.

The Weekend

Have you ever had a weekend where you come home and count the fingerprints that left marks in your skin? It’s like erotic connect the dot where every trace of your finger is a road map where his have been.

You close your eyes and can still feel him on you and inside you. You breathe in and the scent of his skin sends goosebumps up your flesh.

Your hand slides down your body and between your legs that are wet at memories of his touch. Your finger slips inside yourself and you imagine his cock.

You grab your vibrator and lie on your pillows, feel the softness of cotton sheets. In and out your fingers move, you push the vibrator on your clit.

Your legs spasm as you cum, and a smile alights on your face. You go outside and light a cigarette and think of the night before, your fingers start playing connect the dots with the marks he left…

Have you ever had a weekend like that? Hmmm neither have I……

…………………..or perhaps, I did 😉

Wicked Games

We sit in the living room, a music video playing on the tv. I sip my wine and feel the liquid warmth spread through my veins leaving me as light and airy as a balloon on a summers breeze.

He tugs at my hand and pulls me towards him, thick, hungry lips seeking mine.

With a swift movement he pushes me onto my knees before him his hands holding my shoulders as his hips raise towards my face.

“Put my cock in your mouth” he commands and eagerly I comply. My fingers yank and tug at his drawstring, then pull impatiently at his boxers. I grasp him and draw down my mouth, my tongue tasting him then taking him in.

He grabs his phone and the flash momentarily blinds me, as he snaps pic after pic. I look up at him with large doe eyes, my jaw struggling to to open wide enough to accommodate him.

He stares into my eyes as I suck his cock then tells me to rise.

I follow him to the bedroom and he throws me onto our bed. There will be no “love making” tonight, only pure, raw animal sex.

He grabs my pajama bottoms and yanks them down then thrusts himself inside me, my legs snaking around his waist.

“Who do you own?” I whisper to him, nails leaving streaks of red down his back.

“You” he half growl, half says then his teeth sink into my neck.

He pulls me and moves me like a rag doll, powerless beneath strong hands.

He slips into my ass, then slips his fingers inside my sex, I push the vibrator on to my clit. My orgasm takes me in every direction and I am shaking as I try to catch my breathe. We lay for a moment before he’s at it again, throwing me onto his chest.

He is a glove, my body the fingers and I begin to rock my hips. My hair is pulled back and he thrusts harder his other hand finding my neck. As he squeezes he asks me “Whose body is this? Whose orgasm do I control?”

“Mine” I tell him, as I give into the sensation words pouring from breathless lips.

Over and over I spasm, stifling my cries from feelings almost too intense.

He brings me to the edge then back again a cruel yet wickedly delicious game. He is the puppeteer and I his marionette giving in to the pull of my strings.

I follow his lead into the stratosphere, feel the Earth melt away. It here I lose then find myself, aware of every cell firing like machine guns under my skin.

Later, as we lay in a heap of tangled limbs amongst discarded clothes I run my fingers over his face.

I cannot imagine my life from before. It feels like some washed out, faded dream.

In losing myself I’ve been found. I’ve woken the woman who was fast asleep.

Moments like these are my nectar, I drink greedily from the cup.

He is mine and I am his, we belong to others too. Fantasies once only in the mind are the wicked games we play at dark.

Gold Star

She reached for his hand, and tipped her head back, closing her eyes as she settled into the soft leather seat. Her eyes closed and she took a deep breath, his cologne filling her nose and music enveloping her ears.

The tires hugged the pavement as they traveled in the cool fall night, and she found a smile had formed on her lips.

As her fingers traced lazy circles in his palm, she asked,”Do you think we’ll like them? That they will like us?”

Even with her eyes closed she could sense the light that was dancing in his gold flecked eyes.

“Of course”, he replied, bringing her hand to his mouth and kissing it. “If I can’t take my eyes off you, he doesn’t stand a chance”.

Her stomach turned its usual somersault at the contact of his lips on her skin.

“And,” he went on, as she noticed the car had come to a stop, “We’re here so your about to find out….”

She stretched out her fingers and found his hand, the familiar current of electricity between them shooting through her skin.

“Do you think we’ll like them? That they will like us?” In spite of her eyes

“ Do you think we’ll like them? They’ll like us?” She asked. Eyes still shut she was aware that he was smiling, amusement in his tone. “Look at you”, he replied, “ you’re beautiful, how could they not?”

Her pulse quickened and she was grateful the car was dark as it hid the blush spreading on her cheeks. A decade together and yet, a few words from him turned her into a school girl with a crush headed to her first date.

They had been together for years yet everytime he spoke this way, she felt like a school girl on her first date, nervous and a little shy.

Opening her eyes she glanced over, taking in the lines of his jaw, the scruff

Soon they arrived, and he went to her side to open the door, clasping his fingers around hers, an anchor for her ship that steadied her each night.

They entered the bar and found them. Her eyes taking them from across the room. “Damn” she thought, he most definitely knew her likes.

The man was muscular with jet black hair cropped close to his head. Even from her vantage point as she made her way towards them she could tell he, like her husband, was sleek and fit. The woman was equally beautiful. Her long hair cascading around her shoulders with eyes that sparkled and danced. She was tall, classy and together they made a well matched set.

After initial hugs they all sat round the small table and conversation flew by. They had much in common and with the relief, she realized hours had passed, no awkwardness in sight.

From there they hit the club, music enveloping them like blankets on a cold winters night. It wasn’t long before they found themselves switching partners. She with her husband and her husband with his wife. The beats thumped around them, inside of them, as bodies pushed around 4 people lost in a world of their own.

She took her time in the club, enjoying the build up to the kiss, choosing for awhile to merely touch. Fingers snaking beneath his shirt, teaching the outlines of his pecs, fit like her husband yet completely his own. His lips grazed her neck and she shivered down to the tips of her toes.

She glanced to the level above where her husband was holding their new friend round her waist, his arms wrapped round and pulled her in tight. As he kissed her, she watched, feeling the wetness growing between her thighs.

She turned her attentions back to her friend and was satisfied to feel the sparks in her toes when their own lips met.

In agreement they decided to leave the club and make their way towards the hotel and the suite with a hot tub they had booked “just in case”

It didn’t take long before the party truly began, clothing shedding from bodies like molting snakes in the desert sun.

Her husband and the woman took the bed, she and the man took the hot tub, bodies sliding into water soothing desire parched skin.

She climbed onto his lap, a pair of black lace panties separating need and want. She kissed his lips and neck, as he ran his hands down her back. His erection pressed firmly against her as she let the water rock them from side to side.

When she could stand it no longer he grabbed the condom then rejoined her in the tub. Her panties floated on the surface as he dove deep inside. She titled her back, feeling her hair dip into the water, as he leaned in biting the hollow of her neck.

Twin screams of pleasure escaped from the room as she and the woman cried out to the night. As her body moved in time with the mans, slippery legs wrapped tightly round his waist, she knew only a few feet away, her husband and the woman where in their own pool of desire, swimming deeply in a sea of want and lust.

After a time, they came back to reality, satiated long enough to leave the tub and make their way to the bed. Joining the two naked bodies illuminated by the moon shining through the blinds.

Her breath caught in her throat for a moment, overwhelmed with the beauty of the site.

She slowly crawled onto the bed, drinking in the site of her husband, flesh pressed against the woman’s back. She felt her fingers reach, then touch the soft and silky skin of the woman, then arched her back as the man thrust inside her and she suckled her new friends breast. She moved to her lips, and kissed pillow soft lips, so different from that of men. Her husband pulled her hair, bringing her head up to his for a kiss. Releasing her, she became a laser her mouth zeroing in on his cock, the taste of him flooding her tastebuds as delicate feminine fingers caressed her breasts. All the while her hips moved to the rhythm of the cock that filled her, her back arched like a cat as he gripped her hips.

Not a single one of them was aware of the time. It seemed the world had melted away as they lost themselves in a tangle of arms and legs.

When another orgasm rocked her she felt herself quiver then her legs began to shake. One by one like dominoes they joined her in her leap till satisfied they lay naked and panting over ecstasy’s cliff.

The clock read 3 am and reality rudely shoved its way back in. Reluctantly they began to dress, knowing responsibilities could not be dismissed. With hugs and kisses they parted ways, each already anticipating their meeting the following week.

As they made their way home in the dark, empty streets, she could not hide the smile that spread to her cheeks. Opening her notepad she wrote a reminder to buy a packet of gold star stickers, a new inside joke that made her laugh with glee. The woman had mentioned as they lay naked in the bed, limbs entwined like fallen branches in a Summer breeze “so did we pass? Do we get a gold star?” as she let out a musical laugh.

“Indeed” she thought as her hand laced inside her husbands and she once more leaned back into the comfort of her seat. She would give them each one the next time they met.

She looked at her husband and blew a kiss towards his scruffy cheek. He squeezed her hand and in the moment it took to glance at her before directing his gaze to the road, she saw everything she ever needed to know.

“You’re not just my gold star” she began, her voice choked with the moment and what she felt. “You’re my moon and my sun and I love you so”.

She leaned back in her chair and in moments was fast asleep. She knew he would get them home safely and knew her cat nap was necessary for it was not yet the end of this night.

In a few hours they would wake, bodies pulled like magnets towards each other the events of the night playing in a loop through their heads.

As they pulled and tugged off clothing letting it fall in heaps to the floor, they connected their bodies and minds saying everything they needed without words.

They would see them again, she thought, as they settled into sleep. She had a feeling this was the start of something special indeed.

Last Night

There is something magical that happens when you let yourself be open to all the possibilities in love and relationships.

When you rip open the box society has placed you in you discover a world that is far more complex and beautiful than you ever imagined.

Last night was one of those nights. This expansion of body, mind, and soul transcends words and can only be felt.

To open your heart to more than one person. To allow yourself to be vulnerable and simultaneously brave, it transforms your reality and shows you paths you never imagined.

I sit here with a smile on my face and my brain jumbled with thoughts, my body is pins and needles and it feels so fucking right.

There is no glass ball to look in, no tea leaves to be read. The future is just as unknown today as it was the day before.

Yet, somehow, strangely, it feels more certain too.

Walking then running then leaping into the unknown, free-falling into something so outside of my comfort zone.

Love is the most powerful of emotions for in it is wrapped, hope, fear, and desire. It is a magnet that draws you into the mind and body of another and pulls you in tight.

Sleeping in the arms of one man, waking up to feel the kiss of another, so strangely beautiful and hard to quantify.

The box is not merely ripped, it lays shredded beneath my feet. Freed from convention, I am an explorer in a foreign land, ready to take in the sights.

Date Night Part 3

The saga will come to an end in part 3 of Date Night (or will it…)

My lips are bruised. My thighs chafed and raw. I stopped counting the finger prints on my arms and legs after I got to 5. I slip on my comfy sweats too swollen in delicate areas for jeans, settle in with a cup of coffee and replay the events of last night. Should anyone walk into the living room they will wonder why I am sitting here with a stupid grin on my face and basically pajamas in the middle of the day.

He knocked on the door after work. I refused to do another white knuckle drive. My overnight bag packed hours before we headed out to grab dinner to eat at his place.

It’s funny how it works, after a week or two of spending time with someone new, conversations flow with ease, what was once unfamiliar is now comforting.

Once we arrive we head inside to greet his wife. My husbands lover and my now dear friend who is so similar to myself it took us both by surprise.

This is the first time it’s just been the 3 of us as my husband is at a function and won’t arrive till late. I can’t deny it, even now, just recalling this I am getting a little wet. I had wondered what it might be like and was not disappointed one bit.

We sat him down on the couch taking turns kissing him and each other, exploring the sensations and touch. When she and I went down on him together I wanted my camera if only to capture the look of pleasure and desire that crossed his face. It was a moment captured if not by camera then my minds eye and image seared into my brain.

We teased my husband with texts telling him to hurry up, and join the party at hand. When he arrived it was but minutes before he was naked, worshipped and adored. Did I mention these are lucky men?

She climbed on his lap and I on his face and his moans became muffled under my thighs.

Click. Click. Click. The sound of my camera echoed in the room as her husband caught magic and froze time.

We tried to watch a movie, honestly we did, but soon my pants where around my ankles and his cock inside me as we tried our best to be quiet. It is not easy though when your body is rocked by current and your head is screaming “this. This is what it means to be alive”

We glanced over at my husband and his wife who had begun their own silent dance of two and the movie was forgotten as we gave in to one another on the sofa, in the dimly lit living room.

Eventually, I lost track of time, we said our goodnights and I went to his room, my husband to hers.

We swore we would sleep, truly we did, but an hour passed, then another two.

It is like this when you first connect. Your brain is flooded with chemicals, you are constantly high. A touch, a kiss, fuck even breath on your neck and you crave them, need them inside you, it is never enough.

I remember once, long ago, reading a study on when people first meet. From your brains signals to the saliva in your mouth, every inch of you is designed to accept the pleasure you receive.

The scans they did showed that it is the same as doing coke, each time you connect is another high.

It is how I feel as my I drift in and out of the moment, like I’ve been drugged, my system on overload, my nerves humming and alive.

Just kissing is out of the question because it leads to my clothes on the floor. My body cannot get close enough, my hands cannot touch enough, there is never enough time to explore.

I lost myself over and over again, through a kiss, through his cock, through his touch. As I thought of my husband, in the next room, laying naked with my friend, their bodies pressed close in the dark, I became turned on once more.

In the morning, we dress, head downstairs for breakfast, the evidence of last night, discarded shirts, socks and panties strewn across the floor.

We all pitch in and help clean up, then shortly say our goodbyes. In the morning light, with plates of eggs and coffee mugs in hand, I am struck by the natural feeling of it all.

We are friends and lovers, lovers and friends and it feels incredibly right. There is no weirdness, no regret, no “walk of shame” just four people discovering a different way of life.

There is fucking, the kind I’ve done countless times before and then there is this. It is deeper, better, something more.

As we drive home, I hold my husbands hand and I tell him how thankful I am to have him in my life. In opening our hearts to others it is strengthening the thread connecting us, allowing us to appreciate each other more.

In her eyes I see how special he is. In his eyes he sees how another views me. We are wearing another persons lenses and it has sharpened our eyesight.

I am learning much through this exploration we are on, every day I discover something new. It hits me that it is not us who have it wrong but the message we are told from the day we are born.

You can have more than one person in your life because your heart is bottomless and has room to be filled. You can take the intensity of the new and reclaim the intensity with the old. Lust, love, need, want it all comes together to drive you mad with passion and a need for more.

We walk into our house and he kisses me with an intensity that leaves me breathless. I am suddenly airborne as I am thrown over his shoulder and taken to our bed. Our clothes come off in a frenzied fury of want and lust, just like that I have “snorted another line”. I look into his eyes as I orgasm, my nails dig into his back.

“I love you” I tell him as emotions crest and flow throughout me, for in this moment, there is no one else but the two of us. The world outside has ceased.

We lay on our bed, his seed mingling inside my body with my lovers from a few hours before. I can smell them both on my skin, feel the fingers in my hair touch the phantom ones from the night before.

My coffee has grown cold as I’ve lost myself in thought and I stand to warm it and resume my day. Tonight is a new night and we’ll see them again.

I suspect tomorrow will be a day of rest. This well fucked, full hearted, happy and content body will need a break!

Date Night Part 2

Date night part 2….

(And the fun times continue….)

My radio blares from the tiny speaker on my counter as I run a brush through my hair. My voice,sadly off key fills the now steamy bathroom as I ready myself for the night. I grab my body oil and rub it into my skin, relishing the silky smoothness it creates.

Back in my bedroom I go through my lingerie drawer deciding what color feels right tonight. I have a rainbow to choose from and settle on a fuschia and pink set, vintage style with hip huggers and half corset that hugs my breasts. It is the perfect combination of sexy and sweet and I have a feeling he will love it.

I throw on a casual sweater and tights, I love keeping him guessing on wether what is underneath is naughty or nice.

My husband has to work late, so I shoot him a text, “heading out. Be home in a few hours. I love you’

“Love you too, have fun tonight” comes his reply.

The road is already dark, rain and fog make it nearly impossible to see. I drive slow and careful, my brain says be cautious, my body says hurry up. After what feels like forever, I arrive. I head inside and greet him with a kiss which leads to me suspended in mid air, legs around his waist, really being kissed.

The wall digs into my back but I’m oblivious, I’m lost somewhere in space. Eventually coming up for air he puts my feet on the floor and I grin as I say “hello”. That, I think, is how all girls should be greeted, as I touch my now tender lip.

Jazz music is playing and the smell of the dinner he’s made for us fills my nose reminding me I need to eat. It is hard to concentrate on dinner though, when what I crave is dessert. We set our alarm, tonight we are on limited time and finish up our meal. It takes only a few seconds before our lips reconnect and we make our way to the living room where I am commanded to change. I strip slowly, letting him take my body in then put on the skin tight pink dress he likes so much. It hugs every curve and fits like a glove. He tells me to sit on the sofa and I look up at him with wide eyes. Tonight he is “sir” his wish my command and he quickly shows me what he desires.

Hand wrapped tightly in my hair, he pulls down his pants and I open my mouth. I just ate but am suddenly starved and when he tells me to look at him I do. His cock is my lollipop and i have a hell of a sweet tooth tonight.

He stands me up and takes my hand,has me walk up the stairs my dress around my waist. I am half tempted to turn around and have him take me on the landing but I do my best to obey.

On his bed are a few new toys and a handwritten note from his wife. “Have fun” it reads and signed with a heart. I cannot hide the smile on my face. I am one lucky woman I think just as “Bend over the bed” is demanded, his voice a half whisper, half growl full of authority and desire.

“Yes sir”, I reply. He grabs my ass as he thrusts himself inside me and I hold onto the sheets as my feet lift off the floor.

I arch my back to meet him, my hair falling down my waist. He stands me up and turns me to face him and we tumble to the floor. The carpet is rough on my tender skin but I pay it no mind. I am a girl on fire lost in the throws of lust.

Back on the bed he tells me to close my eyes then to keep my hands above my head. The soft feel of feathers tickle my skin followed by cold metal running across my thighs. I shiver and do my best to lay still, giving him time to explore.

His fingers are inside me and I soon learn he can fuck me with more than his cock. I wriggle away and he holds me down, “you’ll take what I give you” so I do.

He puts his fingers in my mouth, I taste myself on his skin. I loose my role and forget myself command him to “fuck me now”. We are both it turns out, a bit of a switch.

He takes the new toy, turns it on, holding the remote out of my reach. This lovely toy is has two ends and I am giddy with excitement, as he fills me with it then himself. I grab my wand and place it on my clit feeling every nerve ending in my body come to life. I think how beautiful chemistry is as I give in to an orgasm that doesn’t end.

It is like that first shot of alcohol, the first hit of a joint. A warmth spreads through your belly then down into your toes. You feel tingly and numb yet gloriously alive. I am an addict and this is my drug I want another hit.

On my back, my stomach and knees, he puts his cock where he desires, I’ve become his living doll.

Our bodies are frenzied as we touch and kiss, magnets in the others orbit we cannot pull apart.

The alarm signals it’s time to go and I search for my clothes. I will laugh the next morning as his wife sends me pics of the clothes I left behind.

I kiss him at the door as I say goodbye and white knuckle my way back on twisty country roads.

As I pull into my driveway I see my husband is home and my heart begins to beat like humming bird wings. As I share the details of my adventure I feel him growing hard in my hand. “I called him sir” I tell him as pushes me onto the couch. “Should I do the same for you?” I ask. He grabs my hair and fucks my mouth in reply.

He lifts me in his arms and carries me to our bed pulls my shirt over my head. He binds my wrists with the sleeves then bites into the hollow of my neck.

He is on me then in me and I yell out his name my body trembling with desire. His eyes are feral as he takes what’s his and I fall again off the cliff. When he is ready he pulls out cumming on my stomach, my breasts. I have been marked, reclaimed and it feels so fucking right.

I lay in our bed and close my eyes sighing with happiness. For two solid nights I’ve given up and given in, letting them play cat to my mouse.

Finger shaped bruises line my pale skin, war wounds earned on the battlefield of lust and love.

I curl up beside him my head nestled on his chest. I listen to his breathing as sleep overtakes us both. I feel the now familiar stirring of the butterflies forming inside my belly and I smile. Tomorrow we will see them both.

If one on one is this much fun, I can hardly wait for Two on two….

Date Night

I watch him as he gets ready. A pair of well worn jeans hug his hips and soft sweater clings to his muscular chest..

He grabs his leather coat and his car keys from the dresser then comes to me for a kiss.

“See you around 10”, he says as he heads towards the door.

I smile as I think of where he is headed, happy for him and for her.

My husband is on a date with his girlfriend and I feel myself getting wet at the thought.

My mind wanders to what they are doing. The view of his body and the sound of her voice. I head to my bedroom and lay down on the bed, my magic wand grasped tightly in my hand. It doesn’t take long, I am already halfway there and I lay for a moment as pleasant spams move like lightening bolts under my skin.

He strolls in a few hours later and I hold myself back from jumping him in the hall. He begins to prepare for bed and I head into our spare room, putting on the black teddy and thigh highs I’ve hidden there.

He grins when I emerge, his eyes taking me in and growing wide.

“Damn”, he says, as his hands wrap around me and cup my ass. Electricity soars through my toes, his lips find mine and I am lifted off the ground and carried cave man style to our room.

We are no longer proper professional humans with respectable jobs and lives. We are animals, desperate to remove the barriers of clothing that prevent our bodies from merging into one.

He throws me down, ripping of my panties, burying his face between my thighs. His tongue is on me and inside me and I grip his ears with my hands holding him like a vice. The sensations are overwhelming, I feel them from fingers to toes. I am a ship on rocky ocean and only he can bring me back to shore.

He slides up my body, my legs snaking round his back pulling him deeply inside. Our bodies move in sync, our breathe becomes ragged and fast.

“I can smell her on your skin” I tell him, as I use my tongue to taste her scent. He kisses me hard and furiously, my fingernails scratch down his back.

As I begin to orgasm I find his neck, squeezing it I ask, “Who do you belong too?” He answers with the release of his seed into me, his eyes staring into mine.

We lay for a moment, shaking and out of breathe, our bodies satiated and weak.

We slip beneath the covers, our hands finding one another under the cool, cotton sheet. Our eyes close and we drift off, my forehead touching his cheek.

Tomorrow, he will watch me leave for my date, hours spent with my lover, exploring fantasies and wants. We will make the most of our time, knowing it will be a few days before we hit repeat.

I will then dress, enjoying the smell of sex clinging to my pores as I return home to the man who holds my heart.

This thing we do, not for all, yet perfect for us, I cannot supress my grin. I flash back on the “right for the moment, wrong for a lifetime guys” that led me to my “forever and day” fit.

As he walked through that door and held me tightly to his chest, one thing was crystal clear, Home is not a place but a state of mind. In his arms I am there.